Last updated on July 31st, 2025 at 04:47 pm
What Surrender Really Means (And Why It’s So Damn Hard)
Photo by Darius Bashar on Unsplash
I didn’t think surrender would feel like this.
Not like relief. Not like peace. But like sitting on the floor of my bathroom sobbing with grief, fear, and knowing… all at once. Surrender came not as a soft whisper, but as a firm, clear you already know what to do.
It wasn’t just about letting go of a marriage. It was about letting go of the identity I had clung to for 22 years. It was about walking away from the illusion that “good enough” was safe or sacred.
And believe me, I wrestled with it. For far too long.
I tried to negotiate with God. I tried to find a way to stay that wouldn’t feel like a betrayal of myself. But the truth is, surrender doesn’t come with loopholes.
It asks everything of you — but only to give you back everything that’s already yours.
✨ If you haven’t already, I invite you to read Why I’m No Longer Afraid to Start Again. And Again. to see how this moment became the catalyst for my healing and reinvention.
What True Surrender Really Means
Surrender isn’t weakness. It’s not failure. It’s not giving up.
Surrender is a radical act of faith.
It’s choosing to stop forcing, fixing, and figuring—and instead, letting God/Universe/Source handle the how while you commit to staying aligned with your why.
Surrender means finally saying:
“This way of thinking, doing, being, believing, feeling, and just surviving no longer serves the woman I’m becoming.”
And actually letting it go.
Surrender Requires More Than You Think
Here’s what I’ve learned: true surrender is freaking hard, Queens. It requires things out of us that we may not expect and definitely may not feel ready for.
But when you know in your spirit that the time has come to let something go—whether it’s a relationship, a job, a belief, or an outdated version of you—you choose to do it anyway.
And here’s the kicker:
You must cut off every path that leads back to what you surrendered.
No safety nets. No back doors. No more romanticizing what already showed you it’s not right for you. This is what can keep you stuck in loops of trying to force a square peg to fit into a round hole. Ask me how I know.
"I tried to find a way to stay that wouldn't feel like a betrayal of myself. But the truth is, surrender doesn’t come with loopholes."
Letting Go Isn’t Losing—It’s Reclaiming
Surrender is the ability to yield without condition.
To abandon the identities that once protected you but now only restrict you.
To quiet the ego’s noise and finally listen to what your heart has always known.
It’s not about giving up control—it’s about releasing resistance.
You take back your power by letting go of what was never yours to carry.
Photo by Eric Nopanen on Unsplash
Faith Over Fear: What Surrender Opens Up
To surrender is to open your heart wide to love, grace, and self-worth.
It’s choosing faith over fear, over and over again, even when it feels shaky. Even when you can’t see the path ahead. Even when it feels like you are stripping away every bit of you.
It’s realizing you can stop bleeding from wounds you never gave yourself time to heal.
It’s having the courage to face the pain you buried so deeply that it became your normal.
And finally saying: no more.
You don’t need an apology.
You don’t need closure.
You don’t need the story to make sense.
You just need to say yes to the life waiting for you.
This Is Not the End—It’s the Beginning
Surrender is never the end of your story.
It’s the threshold to the real beginning—the one where you’re fully present, fully empowered, and finally home in your own soul.
So Queen, are you ready?
Are you ready to surrender the guilt, the resentment, the fear?
To stop blocking the life you were always meant to live?
I truly hope so.
Because the version of you on the other side of surrender?
She’s powerful. She’s magnetic. She’s free.
Tell me in the comments:
✨ What’s one thing you feel ready to surrender?
✨ Did anything here stir a truth inside you?
I’d love to hear your takeaways or AHA moments.
And remember:
Be unapologetically you.
